The Affects of AP Calculus

‎Sunday, ‎February ‎8, ‎2015, ‏‎9:05:13 PM

It is unfair. How could such a glorious understanding become a horrid ineptitude? Things were finally becoming clear in the face of the elders but the fraction of a second I am left to venture on my own, I become the most dumbfounded creature on the face of the Earth without even a decimal of an idea of what to do. How am I to become a successful Medical Examiner if even in my intellectual zone I am a frustrated ignoramus? Tell me how, I would love the enlightenment.

Rather, enlighten me on how to grasp the concept of the dreadfully appealing, mind-warping subject that is calculus. I do not participate for the prize of passing and gaining the credit, but to actually comprehend the functions and units I have been drowning in.

I have no intentions of boasting here, but I am a highly intellectual being and it flabbergasts me that math, a complexity so simple once understood, is an intangible hurdle, so suddenly. It is as if I have yet to focus my pupils on the whiteboard full off that dull black marker.

I thought it might be this: I do absorb the knowledge and lessons the elders provide for me. But once there is a twist - for example, adding sine to an equation that had not been included during the lesson – I lose all training and my brain falls limp. Common sense commits suicide along with memory, and logic is mutilated by my imaginations’ sudden ideas of fictional, action-packed journeys.

Perhaps it is this, but even so, I refuse to accept the excuse – or any, for that matter – as an excuse does not exempt me from failing if I do.